I Make It Look Easy
by KillerLover
Summary: pre-/sequel to I Love This Doktor! Scout and Spy's side of the story. Warning: slash/yaoi/whatever you want to call it. Also, bad language.
1. Chapter 1

Author's Note:

This is the both the prequel and sequel to I Love This Doktor! I would read that first… since I did write it first, but if you wanna read it after (or, you know, not at all) this that's cool too. This will stretch from before and after ILTD and will contain scenes from that story, but they won't just be copy pasted. Well some parts of them might be, but this story is about SCOUT so it will be from his perspective, mhmm.

Also, because this is about Scout there will be tons of foul words. And I might be a bit… more sexually explicit. Scout thinks with his penis a lot, I think.

Anyway, I do have a head start with this story, I have a few chapters done at the time of posting this, they just have to be transferred from paper to the computer and whatnot. After all, I started writing this in the middle of I Love This Doktor! (around chapter… six is where I started writing this, but I had been thinking about it for awhile before that).

**Quick warning**: there will be bad language and some sexy scenes. I plan on keeping it..light enough for FF standards (at least, lighter than I've seen some things there). But if you're not cool with it might as well hit the back button! This is only for mature audiences.

-Chapter 1:

The common room was alive with festivity: Scout had captured the intelligence three times in a row that day. What wasn't to celebrate? Demoman was drinking, Soldier was telling war stories, Engie and Pyro were taking turns playing Engie's guitar, and so on. The BLUs had been slaughtered that day; it was a good day. Yet there Spy was, brooding in the corner with a pack of cigarettes. The man normally would at least have a glass of wine in victory on a day like this. Sure, the Spy had a way of staying in the background, but it just bothered Scout how he was acting today. Spy hadn't said one word of congratulations to him and that just wasn't cool.

After the festivities died down and everyone started heading off to prepare for battle the next day the best way they knew how (sleeping, of course), Spy stood and exited the common room, heading to his bedroom as well. That's when Scout decided to make his move, following Spy "silently." Then again, silence for Scout was not speaking, and Spy naturally heard the boy's footsteps, his sneakers squeaking against the linoleum flooring, and so on. No one could outsneak Spy, except for, perhaps, Batman. As soon as he reached the threshold to his bedroom Spy turned about warily, not surprised to see Scout right behind him.

However, Scout was quite surprised when Spy turned around without warning. He thought that he had been sneaking behind Spy pretty well—maybe he'd try his hand at being a no-good, dirty backstabber. Apparently, he had been wrong and it was all Scout could do to stop himself from running right into the now halted Spy.

"Jesus! Why you gotta stop like that, man?" Scout asked, taking a step back to regain his personal space after invading a seemingly apathetic Spy's personal bubble, "Almost ran into ya…"

Spy was curt, getting right to the point: "What do you want, boy?" His tone was pleasant. But if Scout could read body language of more subtle expressions other than the basics a five-year old would know, then he probably would have seen the slight annoyance in Spy's eyes.

And Scout, well, he forgot why it was he had been following Spy. So he stood there awkwardly, racking his brain and naturally fidgeting like a toddler that had to pee—Spy couldn't recall a time he had seen Scout sit still for more than a minute. But Scout quickly remembered. "What the fuck is wrong with you, man?" he stepped forward, Spy remaining resolutely in place even as Scout poked his chest, "I capped the intelligence **three** freaking times and instead o' celebrating like the rest o' us you were just sitting in the back like Pyro lit yer puppy on fire."

"Trust me, if Pyro ever got its grubby little 'ands on Éléonore, zen I would personally kill that souless monster myself and 'and its corpse over to ze bleu Medic to do whatever 'e wishes wiz it," Spy stated blankly, scaring Scout slightly in the process. It reminded Scout not to double-cross Spy ever. He rested his hand on the bedroom doorknob in an effort to hint that he wanted Scout gone. But he knew Scout was as good at reading body language as a small child was and so he added, "As sincere as your worries are," Scout frowned, able to pick up on the sarcasm, "I am quite all right." _Bullshit,_ Scout thought. "Now if you'll excuse me, we 'ave an early start tomorrow—" Soldier apparently thought 'the early bird gets the worm' saying should be tested out the next day "—And I am going to get some rest." He wasn't about to tell Scout he should do the same, knowing the boy would be disagreeable and state something predictable such as "you ain't my ma, pallie." Really, these exchanges with Scout could be quite tiring and trying at times, and today of all days he did not want to deal with the unruly youth.

But Scout stepped closer, not happy at all with Spy's reply, saying, "Not so fast, you gotta make it up ta me."

Now that was surprising. Spy furrowed his eyebrows under his red mask, not sure why he owed Scout anything at all. But he was tired and if it would get Scout out of his hair quicker, then he might as well agree. "What is it zat you want, mon ami?" he asked tiredly, pinching his nose as he tried to be patient with Scout.

"I-, well… I-, uh… um…" Scout started and stopped, beginning to form words and then stopping right before they began to take shape. He ended up just opening and shutting his mouth repeatedly as Spy could almost hear the cogs grinding against each other in Scout's head. But it was a good question: what did Scout want that Spy could give him? He hadn't expected Spy to actually respond like that; instead he thought Spy would just reject his demands like usual. "I want…" Scout said, seriously after a moment, "A girl. Bring me a girl." He didn't want Spy to kidnap a girl or anything, he just wanted a girl to talk to and romance and whatever. He just wanted a girl; it was a sausage fest there. Sure, he wanted to have sex with her too, but not rape her or anything. He'd be a gentleman; he'd watched enough chick flicks with his mom he knew how to treat a girl. But he needed a girl first. It wasn't that unreasonable, right?

Spy burst out laughing at the request, pushing Scout away. He couldn't get a girl for Scout; there were none within a hundred miles of the forts! How was he supposed to get one? And then the logistics of having another mouth to feed? No, no, that wouldn't work at all. And what if the companies found out about that? Ha! Scout was out of his mind to make such a stupid request. "No. Zat is an impossible request, mon ami. Zere are no girls 'ere." And with that he shut the door in Scout's face without warning. He didn't deserve to ask for anything else that. Sometimes he thought Scouts parents were apes and by chance he happened to look remotely human.

-Author's Note:

The chapters may be a bit shorter than normal, especially since I'm handwriting them first. You should see all my spelling errors and whatnot, even though I constantly edit when writing because I'm so bad at spelling and writing (the physical act of writing, forming the shapes of letters, drawing it onto the paper). One time I was wondering exactly what I wrote, haha. So, yeah, when I write them out on paper my chapters are shorter (also my handwriting is huge). Though the later chapters are longer...

Anyway, as always, reviews appreciated.


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note**:

_iEatYourPancakes_: Oh man you have no idea how upset I would be if you ate my pancakes. All I want is pancakes and French toast and waffles and hashbrowns…and just good breakfast food. Gaaah, stupid Japan :( The chapter is short mostly for the reason that I'm handwriting these chapters and then typing them up. For some reason I have writers' block with this story when I try to just type it so I have to handwrite it. Haha Spy's a bastard so naturally he'd go ahead and close the door in Scoot's face. Also, Spy isn't having the best day of his life, to say the least, so he doesn't want to put up with Scout… Hah, Spy only loves two things and one of them is his dog. :D

_LazyAftGerman_: I keep forgetting to update! Woops… I haven't really thought about it (I've been thinking about you know…Japan and Japanese stuff). And when I do I'm all "lol, left my notebook with the chapter written down in my room" and then I'm too lazy to get it ahaha… But luckily I remembered it! Even before reading this review! Yaaaaay!

This chapter may or may not be a bit naughty. It was a hit with people who read the paper copy though, haha…

-Chapter 2:

Even with Scout's banging on the door, Spy could hear the sound of decloaking. "What are you doing 'ere, BLU?" RED Spy asked casually, undoing his tie as he made his way to the dresser, not at all on edge by the other Spy's appearance.

"I 'eard Sniper broke it off wiz you…" BLU stated bordely, flipping the page on the book he had been reading while lying in wait on his bed for RED to appear, "I came to inquire about whezer you are all right or not…" He had an amused look on his face as Scout was pounding on the door even louder, the boy's words unintelligible, save for the curses he was slinging at RED. And RED seemed to just ignore Scout as he continued to disrobe for the night. "But it seems ze boy 'as beat me to it," BLU stated, turning the page again.

RED folded his clothes neatly on top of his dresser so as not to wrinkle the articles until all he had left were his boxers, gloves and balaclava on. And with slight hesitation he pulled his gloves off, placing them down together neatly before pulling his mask off. There was no point hiding his face from someone who already knew his identity.

Although his wavy black hair had been flattened by the mask he almost always donned, bits and pieces started to fall out of place into his face. He ran a hand through his hair, glancing back at the man lying ever so comfortably on his bed. "You sould go before Soldier starts making 'is rounds…" he stated, glancing at this door. It wouldn't be easy getting around the Scout though.

"Euh…" BLU murmured boredly, shutting the book, which appeared to actually be a journal of some sort, "Did you actually love Sniper?" He propped his head up with a gloved hand, watching RED carefully.

"Are you mad?" RED asked, frowning, "We cannot afford to love…"

BLU chuckled, standing up, "I believe we differ in opinion on zat matter, mon frère." He adjusted his tie and smoothed any wrinkles in his suit idly. "Being in love only makes us work 'arder, makes us more careful…" When you had something to lose, naturally you worked harder to protect it, or at least that was BLU's reasoning. "'Ow about I take care of Scout for you…" he asked, pulling out his disguise kit."

"E will zink I am 'omosexual if you do," RED said uneasily, as he saw BLU's disguise.

BLU shrugged, replying bluntly, "You are."

"Zat is not ze point; 'e will come back to me later…" RED stated, moving his shirt and pants to a hamper before setting his other items into his dresser.

"Is zat a problem?" BLU asked, adjusting his tie, "You never were one to turn down meaningless sex, non?"

RED snorted, murmuring, "'Ardly. Zey 'ave to at least appeal to mea somewhat." And Scouts? They were just annoying little brats with baseball bats. They were little boys and hardly men. No, there was absolutely nothing appealing about them. And the problem was that if you give them an inch, they'd take a mile and never, ever leave you alone.

"What's not appealing about Scouts and zeir strong legs…?" Dib BLU have a dreamy look on his face? It was unsettling for RED, considering BLU was disguised as him. "And my Scout never lets me do anyzing wiz 'im."

Sighing in defeat, RED turned and entered the bathroom, "Just 'urry up wiz it." He shut the door, sighing. Today he just didn't feel like arguing.

BLU nodded, doubting it would take that long. Scouts were fast, right? He put on a smirk opening the door to find a very irritated Scout on the other side. He was naturally worried Scout might attempt to smash his skull in until the othnly thin keeping his brains from falling to the floor to the floor was his trusty balaclava, but he brushed that thought aside, putting on the best smile he could muster—and oh was it charming.

"Bonjour, amour," he said, "Sorry to 'ave so rudely shut ze door in your face, mon ami. I 'aven't been feeling myself lately." RED Spy snorted softly to himself from where he was in the bathroom, combing his hair absentmindedly. There wasn't much to do until he got both of the most of his bedroom.

Scout glowered poking BLU in the chest, completely fooled, thinking he was talking to RED, "Cut that pet name shit out out, ya hear me? Now you're really starting to piss me off. And didn't yer ma teach ya any fuckin' manners?" RED had to stifle his initial reaction to laugh at such a statement coming from Scout lest he give his position away.

"Ah, my dear Scout, let me make it up to you," BLU said, extending an arm to loop around Scout, pulling him into the room, "I am sorry zat I cannot provide a girl for you, but I am sure we can find an acceptable substitute, non?"

"Yeah?" Scout asked brightening up at the thought, "Like what?" He trotted into the room after Spy like a happy puppy. But the look on Spy's face was unsettling and Scout started in disgust: "You're so fuckin' gay, man."

Spy shrugged, wrapping his arms about Scout's waist in an ever so carefully casual fashion. "Mon ami, zer are no women, no one would blame a… stallion of a man—" RED was dying, trying his best no to laugh out loud, oh was he going to kill BLU for this, "—for giving into 'is sexual urges. It doesn't _really_ count as 'omosexual…" Scout didn't look too terribly convinced "..A man like yourself 'as needs, non?"

"Yeah…" Scout admitted, reaching back to rub the back of his head under his cap, "But…"

"But what? Mon amour, given ze choice of girls you would choose zem 'ands down. So it doesn't really count 'ere where zere are no girls."

Scout didn't exactly follow what Spy was saying—must have been that ridiculous accent—but it seemed to make sense and Spy was saying, but it seemed like it was supposed to make sense and Spy was both smart and he was pretty knowledgeable on what was and wasn't gay. So, naturally, Spy was right. "So how are we doing?\ this?" he asked, pausing to to look back at Spy, "And nothin' queer. You ain't my boyfriend."

BLU faltered for a moment, trying to figure out what exactly Scout would consider gay before murmuring, "But of course."

Feeling reassured, Scout started pulling away from Spy, intending to get to RED's bed. "Let's go, let's go!" he said in frustration as he was pulled back against Spy's chest, "What's yer problem?"

"'Ere is fine," Spy replied, " Better angle." He looped one arm around Scout to keep the boy in place as he shifted his disguise upu, pulling a glove off with his teeth. He wasn't about to get it dirty; he had standards. Pocketing the article, Spy set his hand to wander about, smiling to himself as Scout fidgeted, knowing the boy was trying hard not to get worked up over little touches, especially with his shirt still on, acting as a barrier between their skin.

"Jeesus, hurry up man," Scout half whined, half begged. He'd been waiting so long for any sort of attention and he wasn't going to let Spy take his sweet time with it. But he was forgetting Spy was in control, and Spy was going to do things at his own pace. And so he slipped a hand under Scout's shirt, caressing that soft skin lovingly. Scout was surprisingly quiet, but Spy knew he was just biting back his reactions to such touches, that is until he got to a nipple, then Scout burst out, "You're so fucking gay, c'mon." He grabbed Spy's hand pulling it down before hastily undoing his pants. He felt like he was showing a toddler how to do something; shouldn't a gay guy know where the good bits were located?

Spy chuckled, humoring Scout, redirecting his attention to the boys erection. How he'd gotten it so fast, BLU was still at a loss for an explanation, but just blamed it on youth. He wrapped his hand around Scout's cock, smiling as Scout leaned against him. It was cute how responsive Scout was—even if he was choking back any vocal reactions, his body told the truth. "You like zat?" BLU asked, kissing at Scout's neck absentmindedly.

"Shut up. No talking fagface," Scout said voice wavering, nearly cracking at the end with Spy's thumb stumbled upon his head, teasing the boy.

But Spy had been right when he assumed Scouts were quick, but he attributed that to lack of experience. It was cute, really. He couldn't help but smile fondly as he let go of Scout to readjust his disguise and grab a handkerchief from his jacket to wipe clean his hand as best as he could before putting his glove back on and handling the item to Scout.

"Clean yourself off boy," he stated, handing the item to Scout. Scout didn't want any cheesy romantic words or actions, sadly, so Spy obliged Scout's request for "nothing queer."

"Oh, yeah," Scout mumbled, taking the item, "Thanks…" he didn't even complain that Spy had used it first. He just did as he was told, quite content and fastened his pants once more. "I'm gunna, uh, go now…" Scout said picking up his bat, "Catch y alater, pallie." And before Spy could say anything Scout was out of the room.

-Author's Note:

Reviews appreciated! Thanks guys~


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note:

_Germania_: thanks for pointing out that mistake, again :) Like I said, my knowledge of the two languages are.. nonexistant and I was trying to type it up as quickly as possible so that people wouldn't be like "…what. Are. You. Writing." Then again, for the most part, I don't think the Chinese boys would understand what I was writing anyway… but the German girl probably would. Oh man, I love the two spies interactions with each other. I just love the two spies in general. An uber what? Perhaps FP took out what you said for some reason. Or I'm slow. One or the other. Oh thanks! I appreciate it :D There won't be much heavy/medic in this story though; hope that doesn't disappoint you too much…

_Syntic_: I bet ILTD does help a bit, though I don't think it's exactly necessary to read that in order to get this. Ahh, I'm glad you like it! :D I love me some Scout. And Spy. So naturally I became more infatuated with those characters while I was writing ILTD than with Medic and Heavy… which is why I decided to write this one.. Haha I'm glad I kept everyone in character..considering they're all actually OCs (though they were based off of the canon ones for the most part and then I just started making up my own backstories and whatnot…). Fff, I love it when people actually like what I write. Normally when I go back over my writing I haaaaate it. Though for the like 50 times I've read the past chapter (more like, five, but still) I still quite enjoy it… Oh, yes! Mature content..hahaha. I plan on keeping it on about the same level as what was in the past chapter, which should be fine on here. I've seen things on FF and FP that were much steamier so I hope that I don't run into any issues with that, but I'm quite conscious of the maturity level. I could have written that one much more…hmm. .graphically. Yeah. Then again that's not my style in general when it comes to writing sexy scenes. I slapped a warning on the first chapter just in case…

Oh so the class that I play in game has changed. I most play Sniper and Engineer now! It's been that way for a few months, actually. Every now and then me and my heavy heavy/medic it up and steam roll some bitches, though. AND OH MY GOD MEDIC'S NEW SAW? UNFGH. YES PLEASE.

So, I'm interested to know again what classes you guys play the most and if it's changed at all…

-Chapter 3:

The next day RED found himself eating dinner with Scout. They had arrived late for reasons such as espionage and oversleeping from a nap. Either way, to Spy's rurprise the boy was minding his own business and not talking about the night before. Sure, he was talking—when was Scout not talking?—but at least it was things that didn't involve supposed intimate relations between the two of them. No, he was talking about outrunning the BLU Pyro while he was carrying the intelligence that day and the likes. Even Spy found the tales slightly amusing—Scout really was a good story teller, if you get past how he talked—despite the aloof look on his face while he ate.

"Good job, boy," Spy said absentmindedly as he picked up his plate, "You did well."

Scout brightened up, like a puppy being praised, "Yeah? Ya really mean it?"

"Oui," Spy replied, pulling his gloves off and rolling up his sleeves to was his dishes in the sink. He had work to do, translating German medical files from the other team wasn't as easy as it sounded. Yes, he was quite fluent in that language; nonetheless, medical terminology wasn't his strong suit with German yet. And it was like that BLU bastard wrote in some kind of code. It was as if the BLU Medic was even more paranoid than RED was.

Finishing up his meal as well, Scout grabbed his dishes, waiting in line to use the sink. "So, pallie…" he started off. Setting his plates on the counter before rubbing the back of his head under his cap in embarrassment, Scout asked, "Ya wanna play catch or something'?" There it was. What Spy had been afraid of. But the boy seemed so earnest… Spy glanced over at Scout, a bemused look on his face as he took the boy's dishes, washing them as well. "C'mon, it'll be fun," Scout said tugging at Spy's arm, "Yer always cooped up readin' shit 'n' stuff, ya need the fresh air." He grinned, looking hopeful.

"Euuh…" Spy began, draining the sink as he set about drying the dishes. Scout looked like he was going to start begging at that point and he'd never get any peace and quiet then. So Spy reluctantly gave in: "All right. But only for a little." Scout let out a squeak of excitement, running off to get what Spy could only assume would be the equipment. And indeed, when Scout returned moments later he had worn mitts and a baseball in his hands. Not being one to stand still for long, Scout bounced about excitedly as Spy put the dishes away, practically dragging the older man outside to the back of the base once he was finished.

It was actually enjoyable, throwing the ball around. Naturally, Scout was talking but it wasn't about the usual things that Spy had grown tired of listening to. "My dad used ta play catch with me," Scout said, tossing the ball to Spy who fumbled to catch it and throw it back, "When I was lil, ya know, when he was still around…" He paused, looking at the ball in his mitt before tossing it back to Spy. He continued on, "He made me want to be a baseball player when I grew up…" He paused, catching the ball and tossing it back. "I was real good, too," a distraught look fought to take over his face, "But I blew it. Broke my freakin' arm a week before the biggest game o' my life like an idiot an' I had to sit it out." He held onto the ball while he kicked at the dirt. "Not smart enough for a good job, didn' 'ave enough money for college and I didn' wanna go inta fast food…" He trailed off, tossing the ball back to Spy.

"I'm sure you could 'ave gotten a decent job, ami," Spy replied, throwing the ball towards Scout—who had to dodge to the right to get it. But Spy wasn't surprised by how light on his feet Scout was; he saw it quite often on the battlefield. Even with his agility, BLU Scout was better. Spy frowned, wondering what would happen if the two had to battle it out. That wouldn't be pretty.

"Yeah right," Scout muttered, beginning to throw the ball not even bothering to make a snide comment about Spy's aim. Spy never claimed to be good at it, anyway. However, as the ball left his fingers the door opened and both parties ended up looking to see who it was. Scout saw Sniper in the doorway, but Sniper was just staring at Spy and Scout quickly realized what had just happened. "Oh shit," Scout said, looking over as he saw the older man sitting down on a tree stump cradling his head. Rushing over, Scout tried to inspect Spy, even though he still had his mask on.

"You okay, mate?" Sniper asked, almost looking concerned as he headed toward his camper—it was like an unofficial rule that all Snipers had a camper. Sure, he had a room, but both he and the BLU Sniper preferred to sleep in their little homes on wheels. They could lock the doors there.

Spy rubbed his cheek, nodding, "Yes. It'll bruise but I am fine." Sniper take that as a good enough answer and entered his camper, shutting and locking the door tightly behind himself.

But Scout was not as easily convinced: "Lemme see. C'mon man…" He tried to get Spy to let him peel back the balaclava, but that just resulted in Spy grabbing Scout's wrists with an iron grip. "I jus wanna see," Scout insisted, attempting to break free from his captor.

"Do not worry about it," Spy returned, kissing Scout's fingers, "It doesn't even 'urt." He smiled at the boy who either bought it or gave up struggling because he realized he wasn't going to win the fight—though before that Scout had been so sure that he was at least stronger than Spy. Guess he got that part wrong. Spy released Scout's hands after a moment of hesitation and readjusted his mask.

"Ya sure?" Scout asked, kicking at the mitt he had dropped on the ground in the rush to tend to Spy.

Spy nodded, picking up both the mitts and offering them to Scout, reassuring, "Positive." Scout grinned, nodding, instantly relieved. He liked hurting people, just not the ones on his own team. Spy pulled Scout down, not knowing what he was doing as he kissed the boy. He had been safe, Scout hadn't come back to him for more—that was what he had wanted—and now he was spoiling it. He was kissing Scout and the boy climbed into his lap returning the affections. He felt the boy's legs against his sides and ran his fingers curiously against Scout's thighs, cursing BLU for being right.

But before he knew it Scout was back up, grabbing the mitts and baseball, calling out as he ran back into the base, "Later, gaytard." Spy watched in shock, pulling a cigarette out of his disguise kit automatically. He was sure he'd never understand the boy—or any Scout for that matter: they were all the same. Nonetheless, an interest in him peaked and Spy made his way down to the medical bay. It didn't take long to pick the lock on the file cabinet. However, each file was in German. Nothing had changed in his ability to comprehend Medical terminology in the past hour. However he managed to read through each file, interested on what the Medic had to say about his current teammates, but he took special care when reading about himself and a certain Sam Jones. What a plain name for such a feisty boy. He was nineteen, but that was no big surprise based on the timeline of events the boy had talked about earlier. However, that did officially make him the youngest there, confirming everyone's suspicions.

Actually, none of the information was all too surprising, but, then again, Scout had diarrhea of the mouth and told them what he was thinking at all times. He'd heard much of it before, whether he had paid attention or not. With a sigh of frustration, Spy returned the files to their proper location and exited before their medic would return.

-Author's Note:

Bet you didn't think I'd get this up the next day! HAHA! I actually have up to chapter 5 written out in a notebook… It's actually good that I have to type this all up again so I can refresh myself on the story haha.

Oh, and just so you know, I haven't mixed RED and BLU spy up from ILTD. In case you were like "wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. _Wait_. Scout was TOTALLY in some sort of unexplained relationship with BLU Spy. What is this RED Spy/Scout business?" You'll understand one day, duckling.

Also, I just reread the Scout bits in ILTD. And can I just say I love this kid?

Reviews appreciated! Thanks.

If anyone wants to beta this story lemme know~


	4. Chapter 4

Author's Note:

Germania: haha, not really. OTL Just wait until I forget my notebook for forever like I did between chapters one and two… Also, I already have the chapters written out (until chapter 5). So, wait until after chapter 5 then we'll see how fast I am…hah. Anyway… haha I love Scout's reluctance to be openly gay. Don't worry though, Spy will set him straight (er..gay) but you'll just have to wait and see which one. Hahaha I love me some Spy/Scout. It's just such a…hilarious couple to me. Ah, I see! Yes. FF does like to throw tantrums over words and characters that people use… Oh man Pyro is fun to play. And fff—the degreaser is so fucking sexy. I can't wait until I have the powerjack. Ahahaha I love Solly (I also adore scout/solly) I'm just awful at playing him. My top three classes are medic (but that's because I've accumulated so many hours on him since the beginning), sniper and engie. Pyro's probably fourth most played overall… But man, pyro is adorable. I was doodling in my notes and wrote down HUDDAH HUDDAH HUUH and drew pyro's little gas mask :D

_Roterwolvenvogel_: I must admit, I didn't like Spy/Scout too much at first. Now it is one of my favorites haha. Ahh thank you! I'm not the biggest fan of how I write actually hahaha I see too many mistakes… Well I hope you enjoy the chapters!

_NuclearPancakes_: oh no something in my pancakes? D: Haha thanks! :) Glad you enjoyed it. Mmm, sexy times! Oh yes but of course, no one has contacted me about being a beta reader yet. So, the easiest way to get in contact with me is probably my email which you can get from my profile. And then we can talk about betaing this! :D

Here. Have some fluff. You guys deserve it.

-Chapter 4:

That night on the BLU Base, a lone scout made his way through his base and out to the back—Sniper's territory. Much like on the RED base, the Sniper had a camper there, which he used as his home rather than the room provided for him in the base—for much the same reason as RED Sniper: locks.

No one made their way to the back, knowing they'd face Sniper's anger upon trespassing. Yet There Scout was, lighting up a cigarette as he shivered from the cold of the desert night. Before he came there he never would have guessed that the desert would be freezing at night—boy was he in for a shock. Without hesitation he made his way to the camper, banging on the back door, one arm wrapped around his thin frame as if that would help the situation. "C'mon, Snipes," he called out, holding his cigarette in one hand as he shook, "It's freezin' man." He hadn't thought to bring winter clothes to the freaking desert. Just as the last word left Scout's lips, the door swung open—and if Scout hadn't been so agile, it most definitely would have hit him—Sniper standing in the door frame.

"Yer not smokin' in here, mate," he stated bluntly, staring down at the pale boy before him. It was amazing how white his skin was after spending day after day running around in the sun. With that Sniper turned away, withdrawing into the vehicle's interior.

The Scout groaned in annoyance, taking a few more drags before dropping the item on the ground and smothering it, complaining, "I just lit up too, man…" He climbed into the camper, shutting the door behind himself, hoping the camper would keep out some of the cold. The camper was small, dingy, messy and smelled like pee, but it was Sniper's home and Scout was just happy that he was allowed entrance into Sniper's domain. He sat down beside the older man on his bed, grinning as he looked around. It wasn't his first time in the camper, but it was just as fascinating.

"Wot ya lookin' at, mate?" Sniper asked as he pulled his hat and aviators off, setting them aside.

He began unbuttoning his shirt as Scout leaned over, Smiling up at him, replying brightly, "Nothin'." He kissed Sniper's cheek before kicking off his shoes, leaning back. He looked up at the ceiling; that poster of Saxton Hale always creeped him out. Wasn't Saxton Hale like…ancient now anyway? Turning about, he watched Sniper, who just sat there. "What's wrong?" Scout asked, lifting himself onto one elbow, reaching out to touch Sniper's shoulder hesitantly.

"Left 'im," Sniper stated, tossing his shirt aside before working on getting his heavy boots off. He continued undressing as Scout sat up fully in surprise. Sniper glanced over as he felt Scout's arms wrap around his body, not having expected that, "Wot?"

"Shit," Scout said, grinning, "You must really love me." But he didn't get any reaction from Sniper—not even a grunt in response. And Scout's smile quickly fell. "Oh…" he mumbled, sitting up completely, "Shou— I'm…gunna go…" he reached down to pull his shoes on but before he could even touch a shoe he felt a hand on his arm, pulling him back up. Looking up at Sniper, Scout bit his lip, unsure until Sniper leaned down and kissed him.

Resting his forehead against Scout's, Sniper murmured, "Want ya here." He ruffled Scout's red hair, running a finger down his smooth cheek. Darn that baby face of his. "I'm no good with words…" he sighed, pressing his lips against Scout's for a chaste kiss, "He… I don't want to love 'im . And I know I prolly don't. But I wanna fall for ya—ya know?" He sighed; it wasn't coming out right at all. "I left him for ya, okay?" He studied Scout's face, and it was hard to read at first until that cocky grin spread back over his lips.

"Ya love me," Scout said firmly, tackling Sniper down on the bed. Sniper just rolled his eyes as Scout sat on top of him comfortably tracing his fingers beneath Scout's shirt. After a moment, he sat back up, holding Scout close as he rested his head on the boy's shoulder. He was drained; at least Scout picked that up, asking, "Wanna go ta sleep?" Sniper nodded, kissing Scout's cheek as the boy climbed off.

Sniper had expected Scout to leave right then, but instead the boy stripped down to his knickers and made himself comfortable under the covers. Staring at Scout for a moment, Sniper shook his head before changing into the sweatpants and wife beater he slept in, turning off the lights before climbing under the covers as well, wrapping his arms around the already sleeping boy's waist.

The bed was small and even more cramped than before, now that Scout was there. And Sniper wouldn't have it any other way.

-Author's Note:

Ffff. I love this pair. Too much. TOO MUCH.

I like this Scout more than the other one, actually….

Reviews appreciated, buttercups.


	5. Chapter 5

Author's Note:

_NuclearPancakes_: Scout does not approve of your awwing.

_13 Angels death_: Really? You mean it? :D :D

_Germania_: Hahaha I can't understand Australian accents for shit, actually. Well, mostly, I can't understand my friend's accent. ,I'. Yes, waiting makes you patient so you don't turn out like Scout. Ahaha I love Solly! He's batshit insane. Which is why he and Bad Girl are the perfect pairing. Baah Pypy is adorable; I love him. Ahaha, so my protips are actually helpful…? Wow, that's a surprise. :D yaaaay I'm helpful! I love me some Medic. I'm up to 100 hours as medic… prolly more like 130 now. Oh noes! You have to look out for them meaniebutt spies. They're douches. Oh, when healing someone don't watch what they're doing intently, always watch your environment. It's your job to mention spies&scoots sneaking up on you to your boo (I mean, healing target and team). Obviously pay attention to where they are going, though. But always watch your back! (I need to do as I say on this one. But I love watching my boo kill leetle men…) Hahaha no I don't get scoots doing that. Then again, I make dispensers…but half the time I don't make teleporters. I'm getting better at that though! I've realized teleporters are awesome. I'm not that bad at being offensive engie, apparently. I mostly play with bots, though, but I've been playing with real people lately and found out the whole lack of "NEED A DISPENSAH HERE" business and the offensive engie stuff. Yep. Thanks! Apparently I didn't have all of chapter 5 written out, and forgot where I was going (I so had it planned out) since it's been so long. Also, I decided to updated Another Satisfied Customer and You Think You're Bad Don'tcha? I'm working on a new pyro story too… that's het (whoawhoawhoawhat) but I'll be putting that shit out once I can focus more clearly on it (re: once I finish one of my stories).

I'm glad people like Snoipa/Scoot. Teehee. –runs off-

Trufax: I put this story on hold in order to get Another Satisfied Customer and You Think You're Bad Don'tcha's newest chapters out. I probably could have had this chapter out much sooner if I hadn't done that.

-Chapter 5:

"What the fuck 're ya doin' in 'ere, Spy?" Scout asked, more surprised than annoyed as he opened the door to find Spy rooting through his belongings. It's not like he had anything important, really.

Spy glanced over at Scout taping his cigarette over an ashtray that he'd obviously brought, replying frankly, "You 'ave sparked my interest, mon ami. And a good Spy finds out all 'e can about zose 'e is interested in." As he spoke, he went back about his business as if he hadn't stopped.

"So yer goin' through my underwear drawer…" Scout stated, not entirely convinced. Either way, he shut the door and sat on his bed, unlacing his shoes. It had been a long day; then again, every day was a long day when working for RED.

Chuckling, Spy nodded, replying, "Oui. People tend to 'ide zings in zere. Zey zink it is an innocuous 'iding place… Also, you can find out about someone based on zeir choice in underwear, no?" Scout grumbled, tossing his shoes in a random direction—anywhere was good as long as they were away from him.

"Anozer 'iding place is under ze mattress or in ze pillow case…" Spy continued as he readjusted everything back to where it had been before he opened the drawer. Turning to look at the boy, he noted Scout's tensing, a knowing look crossing Spy's covered face as he stated, "I already found your copy of Playgirl."

Scout whipped around, blurting out, "S'not mine! My stupid brother put it in my bag." A look of disgust and anger came across his face as he stared at the ground while Spy sat down beside him. "I ain't no queer."

"Oh, mon ami, I do not doubt you," Spy said reassuringly—with such a candid reaction it was hard to doubt Scout—adding, "I just wonder why you 'aven't srown it out."

A look of realization dawned on Scout's face: "Oh." He hadn't thought of _that_. "But dude, what if someone, like, ya know, sees me throwin' it out or finds it in my trash or somethin'…?" Spy shrugged, running a finger down Scout's cheek—and he couldn't help but think about how nice it felt. "The guys in there are like… kinda.. big…" Scout said after a moment, adding defensively when he saw Spy's wry look, "I was _curious_, okay? Jeez."

"Well, if you are so worried about 'aving it, I can take it off your 'ands," Spy stated, adjusting his gloves. He felt like he had nothing for his hands to do, seeing as he left his cigarette in that ashtray of his. But he needed to do _something _with his hands lest he start touching that oh so intriguing Scout. Honestly Spy wasn't even sure why he was so interested in Scout all of a sudden; perhaps it was because his BLU counterpart wanted him. And he took what BLU wanted.

Scout wrinkled his nose as he spoke, "Ugh, gross dude." _That _mental image wasn't going to leave him any time soon.

At least, he thought it wouldn't but then Spy was cupping his cheek and Scout's mind went blank. "S-Spy?" He asked in a shaken whisper, their lips not even an inch apart, "This still ain't gay, right?" He so wanted it not to be.

"Of course," Spy murmured against Scout's lips as he kissed the boy, perhaps BLU was right. There was something to Scouts after all—they were easy.

Chuckling to himself, Spy loosened his tie after Scout struggled with it for several moments. It was like the boy had never worn one before—then again, he wouldn't have been surprised if that were the case. And the boy grinned, pulling the tie off about to toss it away when it was plucked from his hands by Spy, who placed it in an interior pocket of his suit's jacket. Scout just shrugged it off and pulled at the balaclava, wanting it off—but once again Spy interfered.

"My identity is everything, amour," he stated briskly, rolling it up slightly as a compromise. That was good enough for Scout, who latched onto the exposed skin with his lips, testing out what he could do with his mouth. This was all practice for later, after all. He needed to learn how to please the ladies. And Spy seemed to enjoy it as he rubbed Scout's back encouragingly, humming to himself.

Scout grew bolder after that, climbing into Spy's lap and pushing the other man down onto the bed. He reached out hands posed ready to grab. But then he stopped as he looked down. "Oh. Right. Forgot ya don't have them.."

Spy cocked an eyebrow at Scout under his mask, quite amused as he realized what Scout was doing. "Zat is not 'ow to win a lady over," he said with a chuckle.

"What would you know," Scout muttered, shifting off of Spy to sulk beside him.

Shaking his head, Spy sat up, kissing Scout's cheek as he replied, "Enough…" He ran a hand down Scout's back, kissing at his jaw. "You can't go straight for what you want," He murmured in between kisses along his neck, "You 'ave to pay attention to zem too. You 'ave to make zem feel like all you want is zeir pleasure…" He purred out the last word into Scout's ear, flicking his tongue against the flesh.

"But that's kinda like… lyin'…" Scout breathed out. His ma told him that lying was bad.

"It's not lying if you do in fact care…" Spy replied, pulling Scout's cap off, "Eizer way, you can't just grope at zem 'ap'azardly, no?"

He smiled at Scout who nodded: "Guess yer right…" Scout muttered, a little embarrassed that a gay guy was giving him tips on how to treat women. There was just something so wrong about that. But maybe Spy had a lot of girl friends who complained to him about how guys were treating them. Gay guys always had a bunch of girl friends, right?

Spy smiled brightly at Scout, touching his nose lightly with an index finger, replying, "Of course I am." He leaned back down, kissing Scout as the boy compliantly wrapped his arms around Spy. And Spy just happened to fail to mention that it worked for skittish boys too. He was too busy kissing the Scout, his hands slowly snaking under Scout's shirt. No, he'd let Scout know later. It didn't seem important right then as he pressed against Scout, who pressed back. No, it wasn't important.

What was important was getting their clothes off. And so Spy focused on that accordingly, unbuttoning his shirt and pulling it and his jacket off carefully, pulling a condom out of the pocket as casually as he could. As he moved to his belt he noticed that Scout had managed to strip down to his boxers and was grinning up at him. Spy had to give him an A for enthusiasm, really. Slipping out of his pants, Spy climbed back into the bed, on top of Scout as he kissed the boy. Something in the back of his mind was telling him he really shouldn't be doing this; he shouldn't deflower the boy and yet there he was pulling Scout's boxers down, kissing his stomach reassuringly.

"So, boy," he said, pulling his own boxers off and tossing them onto the ground on top of his pants, holding up the condom as he looked at the other questioningly, "'Ow would you like it?"

"I…" Scout murmured, inspecting the other man, "Damn." And then he looked at the condom, a laugh escaping his lips. "Do you always carry that around, or what?" he asked, tilting his head.

Spy chucked, opening the packaging, "It never 'urts to be prepared, no?"

"Right," Scout replied, watching as Spy pulled the condom out, biting his lip, "Ya want to.. um.. How about.. You.. um.." Man, his health teachers never told him it would be so awkward. Then again, they taught him abstinence only. With a grunt he took the condom, inspecting it for a moment before rolling it down his own shaft and looking back up at Spy expectantly. "Like this," he whispered.

Honestly, Spy was quite surprised. He had expected Scout to end up wanting it the other way around, but he refrained from commenting. Instead he just nodded, positioning himself over the boy, murmuring, "As you wish…" He pressed against Scout before pushing himself down. When was the last time someone had entered him? He couldn't remember. And yet he was letting the little runt do him. He shook his head, baffled by the whole situation. What did he get himself into?

-Author's Note:

Lolololol. Scout topping Spy. I… honestly didn't expect that, but at the same time it makes sense. I just.. oh, Sammy. He'll learn to like catching more than pitching, promise.

To read any of my comments/thoughts on this story/chapter or any of my other stories feel free to stop by quadruplebypass dot blogspot dot com


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note:**

_Germania_: I know D: Sorry it took so long! Hehe Spee and his condoms. Psst,theotherscouttopstoo. Hehe. I was all "OH SHIT" when you said you hoped the next chapter would be large. It's quite small, really. Sorry. Maybe next chapter. But hey, at least I got this out in a timely fashion? (Because I wrote it at the same time as the last chapter…) Yes I have. And yes, it is. And the increased passive healing on medic is fuckin sexy. Though, not a fan of the bow. Reloading and firing is too slow. I'm also terrible at aiming the bow (even if I have killed a few cuntsman snipers with it). Oh nice! I recently got a medic achievement; it was Blast Assist (assist a solly in gibbing five people in one uber charge… I almost didn't get it because right as he gibbed the last person I lost contact from him and the ubercharge was almost completely up). I have two left to go... then I'll have to find something else to do with my life. ._. If you're curious: Medical Breakthrough (ubercharge a demo and destroy 5 buildings) and You'll Feel A Little Prick (ubercharge a scout and kill 3 people with the scatter gun). So, the most recent update broke bots, right? At least, on the nighteam servers (where I derp around). Well I got 108 kill assists as medic. Also, I have this bad habit of living when my heavy dies now. I don't know what's up with that. And by bad, it's actually ideal for you to never die as medic. But it's really strange because normally I die before my heavies. I guess the extra +1 health per second is that nice. Also, true story, I've reflected three arrows in my life as pyro. One time it flopped about and hit the ceiling like a n00b, the second time it flew straight into the wall where the sniper had been (but they moved out of the way when they shot it off) the third time? I totally killed that cuntsman sniper with his own arrow. It was glorious.

krazykiki : haha …wait, what? I did! –goes to look- Ooooh, yeah, kinda.

-Chapter 6:

"Hey doc," Scout said, popping his head into the medical bay. He barely noticed Medic tensing; the man never liked random visitors in the infirmary anyway, so it hadn't seemed strange at all. "Ya got a sec?" The man shook his head but Scout came in anyway, saying, "Spy says yer a brain doctor originally."

Medic nodded, replying after a moment, "Ja. Neurologist."

"Wicked! So ya know about like people and their minds and how they think 'n' stuff then, right?" Scout said, completely serious, "So can I ask yer advice?"

Medic shifted about at his desk, sighing as he replied, "You're going to ask anyvay."

"So," Scout said as he plopped down in the chair across from the doctor, "What do you think." Medic raised an eyebrow. "I mean, like, what do you think about me and Spy," he said after a moment, realizing he hadn't actually asked the question, "Ya know... like, together."

Medic shook his head, shuffling some papers around, "It is not a good match." He paused, looking up at Scout for a moment before going back to the papers. "He loves only himself," he continued, "'E would kill you himself if it means helping himself in some vay." Scout frowned, looking down at his lap. "You are a good boy," Medic continued, "I zink you deserve better."

Sighing, Scout nodded, murmuring, "But he's like my only choice here… I mean, it's not like I'm gay or anythin'…" Though, he had to admit, the sex the past few days was far beyond his expectations of what it would have been like with a man. "I jus', ya know," Scout said, shifting about in his chair.

"You vill find someone else," Medic reassured Scout, "But he is not a good match for you."

Scout laughed quietly, looking up at Medic, "Who do ya have in mind? 'Cause I'm not inta ya like that, doc."

The laugh became louder as Medic's cheeks turned a tinge of pink. "I vas not suggesting…" Medic said, "I just zink zat.. you will find someone else 'ere on ze base. And zey vill love you back… But ze RED Spy.. he vill not return your feelings."

Scout ran a hand down his face, grunting in acknowledgement: "I hear ya, doc." But that didn't mean he had to like what the man was saying. "Hey, Medic," he said after a moment, "Ya sound kinda funny, ya catching a cold or something?"

Medic opened his mouth a moment before putting on a tight smile, nodding. "I zink I might be catching one, ja," he replied.

"Well, be careful," Scout said as he stood up, "I think that BLU Spy has it out for ya. Don't want him to know yer gettin' sick." Medic nodded, standing up as well. "Catch ya later, doc," Scout said before trotting out of the room.

BLU Spy sunk back into the desk's chair, pinching the bridge of his nose as he recollected himself. At least he hadn't been asked to heal the boy while giving him relationship advice. He probably would have ended up trying to smother him with a pillow and lord knows he'd hate to have killed a Scout on his own volition.

"Merde," he mumbled, clearing his throat as he picked up the papers he had been fooling around with when Scout came in, pocketing them before checking in the lab adjacent to the infirmary where the Medic's body lay, "Zey will find you in zere, no?" He was tempted to hide the body so they would think Medic was missing rather than sending a replacement, but it was better for his own safety to get out of the enemy territory sooner rather than later. And so he cloaked, making his own exit.

-Author's Note:

Short chapter is short.

Merry late christmas. I could have put this out yesterday but.. I was busy. Also, tomorrow I'm going to Osaka. Wish me luck. I hope I don't get lost. Ffff. I probably won't get the next chapter out until after New Years. So, happy new year, guys!

To read any of my comments/thoughts on this story/chapter or any of my other stories feel free to stop by quadruplebypass dot blogspot dot com


	7. note

**THIS STORY IS ON AN INDEFINITE HIATUS. Sorry.**

Obviously if/when I add a chapter after this one then I'll pick it up again but right now I have no plans on continuing this story.

The problem with writing a story in a fandom is if you lose interest in the game/movie/whatever it's really hard to feel like continuing the story. At least, that's my problem when that happens and I'm not particularly interested in TF2 anymore. My interest has dwindled for months and I just don't feel right not putting this message up any longer.

**Anyone who is/was interested in doing a roleplay with me:** my contact info is on my profile.

Even if you're not interested in rping but just want to talk, feel free to contact me.


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